I have been reflecting on the Queen's life and marvelling at how she took to a life that wasn't even meant to be hers. How she didn't really have a choice in the end up stepped up and became Queen, much earlier than would have been expected.
The way she moulded the role to be more her. Her dedication, commitment and motivation to keep going when I am sure, at times, she really didn't want to be in the public eye again. It is inspiring.
So I thought about our choices, that are non negotiable, like being the Queen.
I have to and want to look after the children. I have to go to work and look after my animals. These are still choices but in my mind the are non negotiable because I want to or need to.
I couldn't not look after the kids or my pets and I couldn't not go to work if I am able to.
BUT...the choices I make about myself are very different. They seem to be more flexible, less important than the kids, my pets and work...
I realised I often put myself last and seem to think that this is ok. I will always step up if someone else needs me but do I step up for me?
What about you?
Do you look after yourself?
Do you step up for you and get shit done or is there something holding you back?
What do you think stops you from doing something for you? I'm not talking about just eating and drinking, even though this is often a task for my clients!
Did you come up with anything?
Here is a list of reasons that might be holding you back and stopping you fir gojng fir it. I will be looking into each area in more detail at a later date but for now here we go:
Fear of failure
Fear of success
Fear of change /of the unknown
Fear of what others will say/think
Setting such high expectations it is impossible to succeed
Lack of motivation and procrastination
Lack of confidence
Lack of belief
All of these above points make you feel stuck. But why are we stuck, what is truly holding us back?
Our stories we tell ourselves, also known as limiting beliefs, that feed our fear, create excuses, and stop us from believing in ourselves so we feel worried anxious and overwhelmed...
Have you caught yourself saying things like;
"I'm not good enough",
"I don't deserve this" or "I do deserve this"
"It's my responsibility"
"I can't get fit"
"It's too hard"
These are your excuses fueling your stories as to why you can't do something.
How about you change your story?
Yes it is scary, yes you would have to make a change but surely it's better than feeding a load of negative crap into your mind, body and soul...
I catch myself saying "yeah, but..." and it is just another excuse, another reason for me to think it's OK to have not done something.
"Yeah but she only had one kids so she can get slimmer quicker than me"
"Yeah but he knows more people so his business is going to be bigger"
"Yeah but she has more money so can afford..."
Can you see the spiral of negativity that is not going to get me anywhere except down the toilet of procrastination and self doubt. THEY ARE HOLDING YOU BACK!
So I want to focus on you, take some time to write down the things you think are holding you back, be honest.
Then choose one of them and try to unravel it, reframe it, be aware of it when it creeps up and tries to ambush you.
Share with me if you like and I can help you move positively forward to the change you want.
Next challenge is to do something for you. To have some fun or do something you love. Go back to when you were a child and think of that thing no one ever asked you to do, you just did it, because you loved it.
Could you do that this week too? Bring back those times of play as it will boost your self esteem, you will feel more motivated and confident to make a change, even if it is small because you have had some time out and some happiness for you...how indulging!!!
Keep Shining x